User blog:Lord Andrew Mallace/The BNO Debit Card

INTRODUCING our New Rewards Program!
Ever feel super slimy? Have you ever felt that you need to be awknowledged for your Looting? Well, wait no more!

The BNO Board introduces its first banking system! We're going to be as popular as Wells Fargo and Chase. (Estimated 200 years until goal is reached.)

With our new card, you can instantly withdraw and deposit BNO bucks (and any other currencies of countries that speak Uzbeki) to your BNO approved checking account. All your looted items are welcomed as well! Heck, throw in your Behemoth Blade for all we care! Got a double barrrel pistol? Not anymore!



What you Gain
When you chose BNO, we offer you a new rewards program. For every davythgouht, mallthought, breaslethought, comment on a breaseblog, jerrythough (horrid), or any gold you donate to Mallace's player in game, we will add 500 points to your account. Every week you stay with us, we'll ad 0.000001% interest to your card! At thate rate, you can earn an additional 1 BNO buck within the next 50 years! (We are not responsible for credit fraud/ riots during economic depression.)

Our Promise.
We promise to provide you with satisfactory customer service, and the best banking account one can offer. We have certified bankers (such as Oogie Boogie) who know all about stealing handling money and properly adding it /removing it from your account. We also have different card background images, raging from a man's anus to an african giraffe. We can even put YOUR OWN FACE ON THE CARD! (see picture below.) When you book with us, you'll know you're in a slimy, looting, Boyz Night Out home. We also accept all ages (see below.) Welcome.



(We are not responsible for any unnamed transfers to the BNO Bird Fund or the Andrew Mallace charitable foundation for the less needy and more wealthy.)