User blog:John Breasly/A Startling Revelation

Okay, Gibbsgirl11 and I were talking, and she pointed out.... well, that I changed. After a good few moments of pondering, I admit that I have.... but why? I'll tell you why. So... yeah. This isn't a guilt blog, this is a revelations blog.
 * 1) Every time I log on, there's some problem that Mallace, Goldtimbers, or Blastshot is trying to fix. But, it would seem that every problem always falls on my palate.  Whenever I finally fix something (and it usually stops the arguments,) all my HCOs "wench" about it, and start more drama.  Thus, I get angry, and, as with Blastshot, they risk termination, which makes me seem like the bad guy for trying to fix things.  I can't make everyone happy all the time.
 * 2) Everyday, whether I have the flu, whether I've been beaten at home, whether I've had the crap beat out of me at school, I log on here, and I'm a listening ear for anyone and everyone's problems. So much, in fact, that I've more than once put logging on before my schoolwork.  Thus, my grades are declining.  No only because of this game, but this is a large portion of it.
 * 3) I have felt terrible (physically) since the 1st of January. We don't know why, but I've just felt really bad.  The doctors don't even know why.  It is all I can do to wake up in the morning and go to school, let alone deal with everyday drama.  But I don't show it.  Why?  Because I don't want, nor need, people griefing for me.
 * 4) Thought my friends are excepting me again, my "love life" is turning sour. I'm not even going to explain it.
 * 5) As my life progresses, I've learned that emotions are not what dictate victory or failure, it is your cunning, your ability to handle pressure, and your willpower. If you've noticed, and I'm sure you have, I occasionally crack a joke, but for the most part, I am either angry or just emotionless.  While emotions can solve one person's problems, in my position, I can't use emotions to fix anything.  Emotions make me a weaker leader when given a tough decision.  If I show emotion, something always goes wrong.