The Weekly Roger Times

What is it?
Paradox has done something that made this other dude mad so he did this thing and blah blah blah. blah. blah blah. AND THAT IS MY ROYAL DECREE

- Some dude with a really fancy signature

And thats how i read the Potco newpapers.

So since i got bored of that i made a NEW newspaper. Regular news is boring. But ROGER NEWS ISNT. ITS LIKE A REGULAR NEWSPAPER ONLY ITS ENTERTAINING. YAAAAAAYYYYYYYY.

Q: Is it real news?

A: OF COURSE NOT WHOEVER ASKED THAT QUESTION, ITS FUN NEWS. YYYYYYYAAAAAAYYYYYYYY.

Article 1
Personality Test!

This test determines what type of pirate thing you are

1. On a daily basis, how much black do you wear?

a. Is there any other color?

b. Could you repeat the question? Um... could you repeat it again?

c. Only if im infiltrating the EITC in a virtual game to get virtual information on the EITC'S virtual strategies

d. AAAARRRRRR AAARR AAARR AAARRR

e. I ONLY WEAR BRIGHT BRIGHT BRIGHT PINK. REALLY BRIGHT PINK. SO BRIGHT YOUR EYES EXPLODE

'''2. Whats your catchphrase? '''

a. By royal decree...

b. Could u use catchfrase in a sententh?

c. The battle is won... i like to be really dramatic.... virtually.... in a virtual game.... oh ya....

d. AAARR Mateys!

e There arent YOUR lady clothes, THEYRE MINE - starts to run -

'''3. On a scale of 1 to Voldemort, how awkward are your hugs? '''

a. I dont hug people. I outlawed hugs.

b. Hug good.

c. I hug like a ninja, really fast. This reminds of the summer of '88 when i was battling people in a virtual game....

d. People dont want to hug me because i smell so much AAAARRRR

e I hug people so hard that they dont notice that I'm stealing their lady clothes

'''4. If you had a million dollars, what would you spend it on? '''

a. Blacker uniforms for the EITC, the current uniforms are to colorful. BY ROYAL DECREE...

b. I would buy a million more dollars

c. I would use it to destroy those who stand in my way. I am a master of deception. Im a shadow. Im a ninja shadow. Im a virtual ninja shadow.

d. I would buy a new parrot AAAARRRRRRR

e.I would buy ALL THE LADY CLOTHES IN THE WORLD BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA

'''5. About how much time do you spend playing Pirates? '''

a. Enough time to write and recite an overly long declaration that no one pays attention to and to execute a few pirates

b. Enough time to get a hot dog from mcdonalds

c. POTCO IS real life....

d. AAAARRR ENOUGH TIME TO PLUNDER DOS DOUBLOONEYS AARRRR

e Enough time to BUY ALL THE LADY CLOTHES. MY QUEST WILL NOT STOP UNTI LTHEY ARE MINE, DO YOU HEAR ME!!!!!!!!!!

For ever A answer mark 1 for EITC

For every B answer nark 1 for Really dumb pirate

For Every C answer mark 1 for roleplay noob

For every D answer mark 1 for Pirate

For every E answer mark 1 for SUPER AWESOME PINK NINJA LADY CLOTHES MCARNIA LULZ AWESOME