The King of Korriban

"I wasn't joking."

-Sean Dane, 2012







"aunt beru pls"



It was a quiet, #blazing afternoon on the desert planet of Danktooine. Aunt Peru was reading an intense holodrama to her son or something, Luke Diewalker. "pls tell me about that time darth nirvana killed vitterbit, this is dumb," said Luke, puppy-dogging his Aunt into submission. "kid shut up you're like 12, isis is about to capture this place anyway. anyways darth $waglington and his bud mick jagger traveled to the sandy planet of korriban," Aunt Peru continued. "isn't it morab-" Luke realized he was about to make an enemy out of 75% of the fanbase, so he shut his mouth.



"SIR MICK JAGGER! WE RIDE ON!"



Darth $waglington pressed on, mounting his Jewelled Ororobird. Following him closely behind was Sir Mick Jagger, riding a weed propelled pony into the sunset while blasting Vietnam War protest anthems on an oversized speaker strapped to its butt. Aha! In the distance, a temple came into view: The Sikh Academy of Mora-Korriban! sorry



Our two heroes continued, rejoicing as they knew their arduous journey was nearing its end. Little did they know, Darth Shia Labeouf tailed behind them closely, riding a Kuat Drive Yards Stealth Trash-Compactor.



to be continued

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