Talk:The Tea Team/@comment-4713152-20111024025926/@comment-3354947-20111024034540

Act V Scene I

Johnny Coaleaston and Matthew Blastshot enter Matthew's study aboard his ship.

Johnny Coaleaston: Sir, Navy Admiral Davy Gunfish is ready to meet you.

Matthew Blastshot: Good. Send him in.

Matthew turns around in a swivel chair and he is revealed to be wearing Darth Vader attire.

Johnny Coaleaston: Sir? Is something wrong with your um... uh

''He looks down at Matthew clothes and notices a stick wear his sword should be. The stick is painted red.''

Matthew Blastshot: SILENCE FOOL! WHERE IS THE COOK?!?!? I DEMAND MY CRUMPETS! I HAVEN'T EATEN IN.. Wow, it must have been an hour. I HAVENT EATEN IN A HOUR I DEMAND CRUMPETS!

Johnny Coaleaston is about to say something but Matthew cuts him off by storming out of the room.

Johnny Coaleaston: Sir, Davy's ship is preparing to land next to ours. It is traditional that the two navy leaders meet each other before the beginning of a battle. I think it would be a wise decision to-

Johnny walks out of the door and slips on numerous half-eaten crumpets.

Matthew Blastshot: ( While drawing a dagger and pointing it at the cook ) Cook! Get me my crumpets.

The cook scurries off and Matthew throws the dagger into his back.

Matthew Blastshot: ( Crying ) Poor man. He had a weak heart, I always knew that a life at see would be too much for him.

Johnny Coaleaston: Sir, you just killed another cook!

Matthew Blastshot: Ah, Davy Gunfish what a lovely surprise. I thought we weren't having this meeting until next week. Please, sit down.

Davy Gunfish enters and sits at a table with Matthew and Johnny standing next to him.

Davy Gunfish: I'm sorry, Sir Matthew but I can't continue into battle. One of my mates is sick, hes a very important one too.

Matthew Blastshot: ( Ignoring Davy ) LOVELY WEATHER WE ARE HAVING ISN'T IT... Uh... GEORGE?!?!?!?!?!

Johnny Coaleaston: What my....Lord means is that he wants to know what member of your party is injured so heavily.

Davy Gunfish: The swabbie.

Matthew Blastshot: HOW DARE YOU USE THAT LANGUAGE WITH ME! OPEN FIRE!

''Mat shoots his pistol like a lunatic and kills a random bystander. Then, Davy leaps to his feet and kicks Matthew in the chest. Johnny Coaleaston rushes forward and tackles Davy. Matthew dances around the fight singing. Davy shoots Johnny in the leg and pulls Matthew to the ground. He aims a pistol at his face.''

Matthew Blastsshot:You will die by the powers of the dark side!

''He does the Darth Vader force choke move, when it doesn't work he continues to try. Davy shoots the pistol but he is out of bullets. Then he draws a dagger and stabs, thankfully Johnny Coaleaston grabs him by the neck and pulls him backwards. Johnny punches him in the face then throws him across the ship and he falls into the water.''

''All exit. ''