Talk:What If Breasly's Loyal Subject Betrayed Him?/@comment-3242795-20130207204715/@comment-4380009-20130207222857

Jason just look through the story add commas, periods, capitalization, etc. Thats what I did, and got quite a bit. Also I agree with John that the story " Jumpts " to much. You need to add more chat in each chapter/scenes.